kadri otsiver


I’ve wanted to discuss this topic for a while now - let’s think about failure. 

 Never before have I heard so many praising words about my work. At the same time, however, I’ve never been rejected so often in such a short period of time. And for some reason, although I thought the opposite, proving myself in Estonia has been such a struggle. Back at the uni time, I was used to winning grants, getting work opportunities, and having good grades - so the future seemed bright. Everything I’ve tried to achieve in Estonia can be described as a series of rejections and embarrassing failures. 

 Now I move back to the wider context. I reckon that out of all the photographic contests I’ve entered, 80% have given me a negative reply, 20% a positive one. Some awards have seemed just perfect for me, and when I received a letter beginning: “I am sorry to inform you that your image…” then I’ve felt like a loser.

So life has been tough for some period now, and it is okay to talk about this stuff. Indeed, Instagram seems to be about success stories and I am also guilty about feeding into this falsity. On a brighter note, however, it is great to see more and more voices talking about this problem and making Instagram a positive tool to normalise failure. 

Here’s an image from my last visit to the permaculture garden:

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